Lot's has been going on. Most of it all good. I walk without a cane or an orthotic now. I am in the 1% of people that happens to. We will take it. My radiologist said my MRI scans look fantastic, again 1% of the people are looking this good at this point. We will take it. More chemo to follow in coming months. Once a week for 6 months. It is aggressive, but so is cancer. Most of my days are okay, I have had three days, not that I am counting, that I have woke up and felt like a normal person. The other days, meh, I know I am a little under the weather.
The last time I wrote, I wrote about acceptance. Acceptance is a big word and a bigger concept. I have been settling into acceptance. Acceptance in this particular case is interesting for me. I have always looked at having cancer as an all or nothing type of situation. Either you have it and get rid of it, or you die from it. Those have been my experiences with cancer. The concept of having to live with it hadn't occurred to me. Until, the acceptance phase kicked in. That's when I realized, Mother Fucker is never going to go fully away. My team and I might be able to beat her into submission for now and diminish her size and impact on my life, but we are going to need to figure this shit out. One thing is certain, I am still in charge. She is not. Acceptance or not, I am in charge. I really hate her, but she is part of me. I have accepted that. From time to time (more than she should right now in my opinion) she rears her ugly head to remind me that she is still here, mostly in the forms of migraines and nausea. If you think about it though, migraines and nausea kind of go together.
So in the spirit of acceptance, I have evaluated what has worked and proven successful thus far in treatment that I have control over. The ketosis diet, yup, staying on it. Tweaking it? Creating a recipe here and there? Of course. I still enjoy cooking. I have accepted that I might not have the physical stamina to return to cooking again for a living. That was a hard one to accept. But to be honest, a chef that can only have two pots on the stove at a time, well, that's not really a chef anymore. Can I get back there? Maybe, if it is in the plans? One thing I have learned; I make plans and God giggles. For the time being, I will do what is in front of me. Heal my body.
How do I heal my body? Exercise, meditation, prayer, food, art, reading, sleeping, live, socializing - both through social media and personal interaction. I am currently reading Kris Carr's Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips book. She has this weird liver and lung cancer stage IV and has never had treatment, but managed it dietarily. Mainly because her cancer is so weird there is not a protocol for it and it is not currently active. She has a lot of good ideas in the book, some of which I am working on implementing. You know I like a book when I start writing in it. Reading her book is like reading my thoughts, there is a lot of underlining and writing in the margins. Her cancer is different and she is younger, but she is living with it, day in and day out. It is a good launching point for me currently. Gotta start somewhere, right?
One of the things I wanted to work on was a good keto waffle recipe. The one I was using had cream cheese and almond flour as two of the ingredients. They were okay, but you knew you were eating keto safe food. I wanted something that said, this is good and good for you, but you don't know it. Hence, a recipe was born, with a few throw aways in between. Eh, part of the process.
Low Carb Waffle Mix - also Gluten Free!
Makes 4- 4 in. waffles
2 TBSP. Ricotta cheese
2 eggs
1/4 cup Flaxseed Ground Meal
1 TBSP stevia
1/4 tsp baking powder
1 tsp vanilla extract
Mix all ingredients together thoroughly, let sit for a few minutes to let the air bubbles out, and cook.
Okay, back to that living thing...
No comments:
Post a Comment